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Better Parenting for Great Results

Let’s forget that your kids are your “kids” for a moment. Instead, what if they are long-term projects that blend a bit of art, some science and a lot of vision and effort on your part? What you would get is a realistic approach to bringing up wonderful men and women. This is not to say you should not have an emotional connection also, but those emotions should be one of several driving forces to do a great long term job raising them.

The most difficult part of this is actually letting go of the ego somewhat. You have to commit to getting better and being in charge of the outcomes, even if they are not necessarily what you would like.

No one will argue that a first time parent will make some goof ups but with each child, a parent becomes much better at handling situations and being focused on stuff that are definitely more crucial. Yet, the first kids often turn out fine anyway, because humans are adaptive and resilient.

Self Improvement Tricks to Becoming a Better Parent

Find instruction on what is possible. For instance, AllProParent.com offers totally free parent training on how to attend higher education ahead of time and complete a full bachelor’s degree at no cost. It also has the strategy to how top level sports athletes are built.

Join an Facebook group of parents focused on high achievement kids. This will be parents who are proactive and trying to boost outcomes from an early age. You can learn a whole lot and draw inspiration from groups like this.

Never stress about a single day. You will get very good days and terrible days. Take a break and return the following day better than even. One day off is just not going to undo your time and efforts.

Remember to have a real reason, not simply “because I said so” – “Because I said so” is what people with no parenting plan say. It really is grasping at straws and using the excuse that you need to demand respect. Earned respect is far more powerful.

Whether you use online groups, on-line parent education, Vimeo or local in person groups, make sure you keep learning and getting better. And have a real plan and end result you are trying for, as outstanding is less common unintentionally.

The best advice is to begin early and keep pushing towards your goals in a calm, steady and intentional manner. When your kids grow up this way, they are used to it and they expect nothing less than high acheivement from themselves, and your job is easier.

Cold Weather Activities To Keep Kids Active

You need to get creative when cold weather hits so your kids don’t just sit in front of a device all day long.

One of the hardest things about a four season climate like Akron, Ohio is the changes in season disrupt good habits.  Maybe in the warm months you hike, and in the cold months you binge on Netflix.  Maybe not.  But kids need to have good cold weather habits to stay healthy and be social.  Sure, school has gym for the younger kids but are you providing enough additional activities to keep the colder months active and engaging?

We assembled this list of possible things you can have your kids do during colder months.  Enjoy.

  • Swimming – Many indoor pools have swim teams during the Winter months, including the Kent Seariders.
  • Indoor Tennis – available in many locations such as Stow, Fairlawn, Medina, Hudson, Aurora and Green.
  • Karate – Lots of local martial arts studios.
  • Basketball – This time of year most community centers and YMCA’s are going to have Basketball going on.
  • Dance – year round exercise in every town.
  • Theater – You might not think of this as a physical activity but if it is a musical they will spend hours a week working on dance moves, as well as singing and memorizing lines.  Many community theaters exist around Akron.
  • Indoor Volleyball – popular with adults and older kids.
  • Pickle-ball – Sure there is going to be an older crowd, but they usually love getting younger people in there too.  Pickle-ball is all over the Akron area.
  • Gymnastics – There are many gymnastics centers in the Akron area, including Flytz in Cuyahoga Falls.  They not only have more advanced gymnastics training but also tumbling classes for the younger kids.
  • Yoga and Zumba – Classes kids can participate in are all around.
  • And finally, there is always the option of hooking your laptop to the computer, going on YouTube and finding workout videos the whole family, or a group of friends together after school, can do together.  A great workout and zero cost.

Whatever you decide, now is the time to develop good cold weather habits so you maintain good health and fitness all Winter long.

Raise High Achievement Kids | 5 Proven Strategies

High Achievement is a bit of a loaded term.  Depending on where you start, high achievement means something different.  Someone growing up in poverty might consider any college degree high achievement.  Someone growing up with a lot of resources might only consider Ivy League schools high achievement.  Also, it might not be academic high achievement you are interested in.  Athletics and having well rounded skills are outside of typical academic achievement but can also be influenced with these same strategies.

Here are five “big picture” tips that can help you raise a high performer in all these areas.  More detail is available at AllProParent.com if you are interested in free access to individual high-performance techniques broken down by the age of your children.

  1. Start Early – If you start working towards a high achievement outcome from the beginning it will be easier because your child will be accustomed to active learning and training, as well as having a big head start over kids who are not starting early.  30 minutes a day for four years turns into 730 hours of learning.  Since preschool and kindergarten are usually short days and only about half of the days in a year, this puts a 4-year-old around 1st grade level right at the get go.
  2. Never allow bad habits to form – For example, the weekend is not two days to take off and watch TV.  They are two days where you can be more creative and hone new skills that are less academic and more athletic or soft skill oriented.
  3. Encourage and reward strong work ethic – Do not focus on “winning” or having perfect days.  Focus on the value of outworking other people over time.  If you repeat these values, they stick with most kids.
  4. Craft stories – Make sure your child understands and buys into a story you are crafting with them.  This could be going to a certain level of school, graduating early, becoming a professional athlete, being good at science, etc.  Ideally your child agrees with this and it makes them feel special and motivates them.  If they do not like your story, then work with them to create a story (vision) of what they will look like when they are older and very successful.
  5. Reduce bad stress and increase good stress – Minimize problems in family, fighting, complaining and stress related to losing a game, not getting a good grade, etc.  Instead, create good stress when they try to succeed but they know it is OK to fail as long as they continue to improve and learn.

This all seems fairly obvious, but it is very hard to do unless you take a long-term, steady approach.  Staying the course is easier with support from other parents and information from people who have raised high achievement kids.  That is why www.AllProParent.com was founded.  To help you plan a better outcome as well as stick to the plan over time.

Lawn Cleanup Tips

What you do to clean up your lawn in the fall depends on a few factors.

  1. Do you have a large or small yard?
  2. Do you have many or a few trees?
  3. Do you have kids that like to help?
  4. Does your Akron area home provide curb side leaf pickup?

There are a variety of techniques to clean the yard.  In Kent, where I like, we have trees that keep their leaves until Spring in some cases.  That means we are picking up leaves throughout the Fall, Winter (if warmer) and Spring.  Because of this I like to pick them up in batches and not try to do the entire lawn at once.

30 Years ago you saw people raking and bagging the leaves.  Now the manual way to get it done is to rake leaves onto a tarp and drag the tarp to the front of the house and dump them along the curb and they will get cleaned up by your city in many cases.

Other options include leaf blowers.  Electric leaf blowers are inexpensive, but will only work well for modest amounts of leaves that are dry.  A gas leaf blower will be able to handle more leaves and damp leaves much better.  Make sure you wear ear plugs to protect your hearing.

Another option is simply to mow the leaves if they are few and scattered.  Mulching them into the yard with your lawnmower set low is good if there are not too many.

Lastly, hire a company to come and clean your yard.  If you are older or too busy, having a landscape company come and use blowers to clean your yard well will save you the hassle and difficulty.

Remember, just like shoveling snow, raking leaves is not an activity your body is most likely used to and it can be dangerous if you push too hard or try to do too much.  You will likely be sore for days and you could hurt your back or suffer other injuries, so make a smart choice to remove your leaves and cleaning your yard.

 

How Food Deserts are Affecting Rural Ohio

Hunger isn’t something on everyone’s minds, but for those who live in food deserts, people have to make sacrifices to eat – whether that means going to a drive-through or a miles-away grocery store. In the state of Ohio, the inability to conveniently access healthy food is a reality for many. For those who live in rural areas, there is a limited variety of food options and a lack of access to full-service grocers. Convenience foods are easier to access, which can lead to chronic diseases linked to poor diet. Heart disease, diabetes and obesity are just some of the serious, life-threatening consequences that small communities of Ohio are facing.

According to a study conducted by the U.S. Department of Agriculture (USDA), those in need of nutritious food can be impacted by the prices of necessities like housing and transportation and further budget constraints when attempting to meet food needs. In addition to monetary restraints, time is also an inconvenience. According to Journal of Extension 24 percent of Ohio households live more than a 10 minute drive away from any grocery store of any size. A long drive to the grocery store, an hour-long shopping trip and another drive home can mean precious time away from work or family. This also means more money invested into transportation, which can impact the decision to prepare meals from scratch, go out to eat or buy meals with less preparation time that contain preservatives and more harmful ingredients than simple produce.

In 2017, as many as 450,000 lived in a food desert in Cuyahoga County, and 137,000 lived more than two miles away from a grocery store. Of those living in a food desert, 83 percent live in areas with high numbers of deaths from chronic diseases. These people are left with few options, particularly if a person’s health begins to decline. There may be an unwillingness to travel or cook, or a physical inability to do so. The responsibility of getting food may have to be shifted onto someone with limited ability, further narrowing food options.

Advocate groups, like those in Cuyahoga, have taken steps to implement more grocery stores in low-income areas and areas with limited food choices. By installing a supermarket in a rural town, job opportunities can open up and bring more life to a community. Additionally, those in the community can make a better decision of whether to eat out or cook at home.

To help a food desert near you, find out more here, and start volunteering or donating fresh or healthy foods to your local food bank. Other areas have community gardens, which is a great way to give back and begin producing fresh fruits and vegetables without going to the grocery store. Combining these two innovative ways to provide food can begin assisting with getting food to those who need it most. Beyond food access, education on these serious problems, how to help and leaning more about healthy eating choices will help conquer this problem in our communities.

LynAnne Vucovich is a journalist who studied at the E.W. Scripps School of Journalism at Ohio University. She has a passion for culture, community and cats.

Do You Have What It Takes To Volunteer This Year?

For a high schooler thinking about going to college, the process of applying to colleges, visiting those colleges, getting the last SAT or ACT test under their belt, and writing those essays to send to prospective colleges can be daunting, especially if this is the first time for them and their parents. 

To attend some colleges and/or universities, the SAT or ACT scores matter.  School grades do matter as well.  The scores they get reflect whether they are capable students, able to meet deadlines and able to work with other peers.  The extracurricular activities show the college admissions office who they are and what they are interested in pursuing.  That’s why it is so important to choose extracurricular activities that really speak to them.

If you are thinking about signing your freshmen son or daughter in every extracurricular activity you can think of, think again.  An undergraduate admissions officer at Yale University, warns parents that your son and daughter should do the extracurricular activities they enjoy, NOT what they think looks good on paper.

Five factors to consider when signing up for an extracurricular activity at their school or in their community:

  1. Do an extracurricular activity they enjoy
  2. Do NOT choose an activity because everyone else is doing it
  3. Do an activity that they can be good at or have a talent to do
  4. Do NOT try to outguessed the college admissions office  to see what activities they are looking for
  5. Sign for an activity that will teach them about the person they are, or at least try to find out what it is they are good at

If your son or daughter enjoys volunteering, this Christmas season is a great time to start.  Volunteering at your church, at a homeless shelter, or volunteering for the Red Cross is a great first step.

Volunteering at their local animal shelter can bring them many enjoyable surprises.  Working with animals can teach them responsibility, and hopefully a work ethic they may not get anywhere else.

How can you get started?  Depending on what kind of activities you prefer, the school bulletin board or announcements board at your school can be a great start. Check your local Girl or Boy Scouts of America, your local community theatre, animal shelter, Red Cross or YMCA.

Some local libraries can use the help of young volunteers for after-school reading programs to help small kids, check with them and find out if they are in need of more volunteers. 

How about volunteering in retirement homes? There are many senior citizens that enjoy having a young person help them with their electronics or just enjoy a conversation. Talk about the latest book you read or what you did at school.  Conversation is sometimes all they need to have a good day.

Need any more ideas?  Why don’t you check this link to find out whether you want to do some volunteering this year? I hope you think about it and decide you do have the time and willingness to do something.

Does Your Cat Need To See The Vet?

Cats can be great pets.  Less fuss and often fairly hands off.  But how do you know when they need to go to a veterinarian if they are not obviously sick?  We went to a local Medina veterinarian to find out what to look for.  Here is what he had to say.

These are the signs your cat needs to go to the vet:

1. If your cat is experiencing chronic weight loss. (in older cats, could be a sign of kidney disease or thyroid disease)

2. No longer grooming itself.

3. Hiding, sleeping in strange places

4. Not using the litter box

Dr. Steve Hicks - Akron Medina Veterinary HospitalChanges in a cat's patterns can be cause for alarm. Your cat should be very predictable and you will notice changes in behavior.

Dr. Steve Hicks - Akron Medina Veterinary Hospital

5. Increased amounts of urine in litter box (occurs with diabetes and kidney disease)

6. Increase in vomiting (most cats vomit occasionally, especially hairballs, but an increase in the pattern could be a sign of a bigger problem)

7. Decreased appetite

8. Drooling, rubbing face (could be a sign of dental disease)

Our cat has done some of these things for years and it is often not a sign to panic.  For example, our cat stopped using the litter box for a bit, we took it to a vet in Kent and it turned out to be because we changed which litter we use.  I learned that cats are very picky about changes and something as small as changing brands can cause this.  We switched back and the problem was solved.

Our cat also has always liked to go up in the basement ceiling when it gets sick of us and wants to get away.  Now that she is older she has stopped, but it was an issue for years but never meant we needed to take her to the vet.  Just her personal space I guess.

The key is being aware of the signs and not hesitating to take your cat to a veterinarian if you notice these kinds of issues arising and worrying you because they are not a one-time thing.

Potentially Life-Saving Self-Defense Techniques

Walking alone, especially at night, can be worrying for some. In Ohio, over 200 victims of human trafficking were identified in 2017, according to the Ohio Attorney General Office’s annual report. Although men and women can both be victims, one in three women will experience a violent attack in their lifetime. These self-defense strategies will improve confidence and may make the walk home safer for everyone.

Self-defense is considered using reasonable force to protect oneself or their family from physical harm inflicted by an attacker. The defender must believe they are in danger of the assailant and cannot excuse excessive force. Other ways to feel safe besides using physical force is keeping pepper spray in your hand while walking, or putting keys in between your fingers. Staying on the phone with someone while walking alone can help ensure your safety, and staying aware of your surroundings helps. Everyday items like phones, keys or umbrellas can all be used as a weapon if someone was to attack you, making them more likely to run away.

If the purpose of the attack is to rob you, it’s safer to hand over what they want than to refuse. The best course of action is to defuse the situation as quickly as possible. Money, wallets and phones can all be replaced, but your life can’t. Getting out and away from the situation is far safer and easier than blocking such an attack. More importantly, trust your instincts. If you get a gut feeling that your normal route home seems “off” that night, or if someone is giving off creepy vibes, go another way.

While you are walking out alone, think about presenting yourself with confidence. According to Black Belt magazine, attackers focus on those who look confused, scared or distracted. These individuals are looking for someone they can easily overpower, and by presenting yourself with your head up and shoulders back, you are less likely to become a target. If someone attempts to engage with you, respond back just as confidently. This could be an attacker assessing how you may be feeling, so don’t allow them to throw you off guard. Avoid freezing up and respond with confidence and stay calm. Appear non-confrontational, but don’t allow them to get too close either and try to keep a safe distance between you and the other person. If they enter your personal space, tell them to back off, and if they don’t, push them away from you.

As soon as you are touched by someone, shout as loud as possible and fight back against them. There is no time for compassion in this situation and it’s important to act fast. The most effective parts of the body to hit are the eyes, nose, ears, neck, groin, knee and legs. Always maintain your distance, and don’t move closer to land a hit. When attempting to hit, leverage your weight into the swing to make your strike land with more force.

The first effective self-defense move is the heel-palm strike. Shove your hand with an open palm quickly and strongly upwards into the bottom of the nose. The second move is striking the eye, which can help you prepare for another attack. The eye strike is simply jabbing your hand into the eyes of the assailant, and whether the hit lands or not, the attacker will probably recoil. The last simple move is the knee strike: driving your need upward into your attacker’s groin, which could potentially end the fight quickly.

To make these moves even more powerful, consider incorporating the use of everyday objects, like keys. Also use your elbows, knees and head when trying to fight back, which are strong parts of the body. If you’re ever knocked down to the ground, remember the heel-palm and eye strike, which are just as effective from the floor. If the attacker is standing, kick at him, as your legs will keep them at a distance. Even on the ground, attempt to aim for the groin with a kick or a knee, and remember to always look for an opportunity when there’s an opening.

Don’t be afraid of what’s out in the dark, simply be prepared. Be aware of your surroundings when walking alone, and always keep something in your hand for a makeshift weapon or a phone call. Try to get out of a situation before it turns physical, but remember that using your body for defense can save you.

LynAnne Vucovich is a journalist who studied at the E.W. Scripps School of Journalism at Ohio University. She has a passion for culture, community and cats.

Absenteeism and Schools

There are many studies conducted by university researchers and professors who pinpoint the negative effect run-down schools have on low test scores and absenteeism in students in the United States.   A study conducted at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign found that dilapidated schools were a big contributor to low scores and absenteeism in schools. Broken windows, classrooms with no green views, dirty bathrooms, or windowless classrooms were found to be a major cause for truancy which in turn plays a major role in students’ low scores. Not every school has the budget nor the space to have green spaces around the school, but having broken windows, plaster, or ceiling tiles falling on the students is a major safety concern and a big cause for students to be absent from school.

What is a Chronically Absent Student?

A  chronically absent student is a student that misses more than 18 days-excused or unexcused-of school in a year.

The Myths of Chronic Absenteeism

According to the National Forum on Education Statistics, there are 4 myths about chronic absenteeism we need to be aware of, if we want to find a meaningful solution to the problem.

  1. There is a perception among parents that a missed school day once in a while doesn’t reflect badly on a student’s performance.
  2. Unexcused absences are the only ones that are a problem. It is Ok if they are excused.
  3. Pre-K and Kindergarten are more like a daycare, therefore absences are not that important during those years.
  4. Attendance is only important in later grades.

How many times a year are our children missing school? Every day, teachers cover material that will not be reviewed later in the year.  If your child is missing school because of an illness, they are missing material that perhaps they will need to know for a test. Grades do matter for the school.  If your child is missing school, their performance can be hurt by their absenteeism.

Why attendance is Important

  1. A student that consistently misses school is more likely to drop out of high school and/or never attend college.
  2. Missed opportunities. If a student is consistently absent from school, gaps in learning will make it more difficult for them to graduate and/or to achieve the levels of education they are capable of achieving.
  3. The social interaction students achieve by attending school daily can make them form bonds with their peers, increasing the likelihood they will attend school regularly.
  4. Graduation becomes more difficult as the school administration’s punishment for missing school makes it harder for students to acquire the credits they need for graduation.
  5. Absenteeism can become a habit from kindergarten, and the ill outcomes a child experiences due to absenteeism can be felt as early as first grade.

What Contributes to Poor Academic Performance?

The roots of poor academic performance are as varied as the student body of many schools in the United States. From dilapidated schools, absenteeism, disabilities, lack of proficiency in the English language, unengaged teachers, and/or homelessness, the causes for poor performance can be one or many of these causes.

The physical state of the school matters.  As stated earlier, the research about the effect dilapidated schools have on students’ performance is clear. The broken windows, broken bathrooms, and loose plaster on the walls negatively affect students’ performance. Furthermore, safety in school matters. According to the 2017 School Crime Supplement, students that experienced a hate-related word directed to them felt more fear attending school than those students that did not which led them to avoid school, stay home, or skip classes altogether.

What is a Hate Word?

According to The National Center for Education Statistics (NCES),

Hate-related words are having to do with one’s race, ethnic background, religion, national origin, sexual orientation, or disability. For many students who are recipients of hate words or bullying, absenteeism is an easy choice to make. If teachers and school administrators do not take steps to ensure the safety of all students, absenteeism will be a problem affecting students and students’ performance perpetually.

Regardless of the level of vigilance from school Administrators and teachers, bullying and hate words directed at specific students are still prevalent in many schools. It is impossible to detect the gravity of hate words being used, or the specific bullying some of these students experience unless the school’s administration takes steps to find out such information.

How To Find A Good Mom’s Group

Becoming a mom is a wonderful experience. It’s also a complete life changer. All of a sudden, your priorities and interests completely change since you’ve got a baby to care for 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. As you make the transition into motherhood, you might consider joining a mom’s group.

Why Are Moms Groups So Great

The beginning of parenthood comes with all sorts of fun experiences and challenges. So, spending time with other moms gives you a peer group to celebrate with, and also a support group to help you get through trying times.

Mom’s groups are also a great way to share tips and information. Looking for the best stroller for the beach or a battery operated bottle warmer? Just ask the moms in your group for their favorites (and the ones to avoid)!

Where To Meet Other Moms

These days, the easiest way to find a moms group is on Facebook. Check the “Groups” feature and there is a good chance there is a group in your area. Facebook is great since you can post questions to the entire group and often get good answers pretty quickly.

Beyond Facebook, there are plenty of other online venues for moms groups.  Check out The Bump, Meetup, and BabyCenter just to name a few.

Then, there are your offline ways of finding moms groups. Believe it or not, it is possible for these groups to exist without the Internet. Check for bulletins at pediatrician’s offices, daycares, preschools, libraries, and other kids related places.

Start Your Own Mom’s Group

If you’re having trouble finding a moms group in your area, you might try starting your own. After all, you’re probably not the only one that wishes there was a local group. While starting a moms group won’t be the easiest thing in the world, it only takes a few people to join before you’ll start to get momentum.


Try starting a Facebook page, and putting up some bulletins around town. Then, plan a fun family event or two. Maybe it’s a picnic at a park or just going for a scenic walk with strollers in tow. Before you know it, you’ll have a core group of moms getting together regularly.

If you’re interested in learning more, check out this longer article on how to find a good mom’s group on Smart Parent Advice.

Author Bio: Cristin Howard runs Smart Parent Advice, a site that provides parenting advice for moms and dads. Cristin writes about all of the different ups and downs of parenting, provides solutions to common challenges, and reviews products that parents need to purchase for babies and toddlers.