Akron Today Magazine

Akron Lifestyle and Entertainment

Health & Fitness

Grief in Two Parts

Grief is in two parts. The first is experiencing a loss. The second is the remaking of life.  – Anne Roiphe

How I am Dealing With Tragedy

It was Christmas eve and he was five years old. He was dressed in his pajamas; the top was white, and the blue pants had feet to keep his toes warm. He was sitting on the landing of the stairs out of sight, watching his father put together Christmas gifts for him and his three brothers. It was at that time he realized there was no Santa Claus.

He thought to himself, “Who’s going to save me now?”

That’s when the depression started. It was a habit he learned at this very early age.

When things got tough he would go inside and protect himself by wrapping the cloak of depression around him. It was his way of protecting himself from feeling helpless. Here is where he learned what helplessness really was. The depression protected him. He went upstairs and put himself to bed and cried himself to sleep.

That is how I felt when my son died on May 30, 2017 at age 35. I would never wish that upon anyone else.

I found grieving to be a two-step process. You must grieve. You must experience the loss, and it is painful or it will forever define you. Grieving is a trying time filled with sorrow, anger, frustration, depression, embarrassment and sometimes, joy. You might experience all those emotions at the same time, a wild rollercoaster ride to be sure.

After you grieve, and it does take time, there comes a time when you start to rebuild.

Everything I believed in, I questioned. Everything that I held as important is not. I learned I can grieve and rebuild at the same time. It is not easy. However, I am determined to find something positive in this experience, I decided to use this opportunity to share with you what I learned.

Though these are difficult times, I have learned so much. I share some of my learning in the hope of helping others through any difficult times they are experiencing.

I learned I have no control over outcomes. I can influence them, but I cannot control them. The feeling of being in control is an illusion.

I learned the only thing I have any control over is how I choose to think, act and feel.

I learned humility. A lot of things I once held as important are not. Not the books I wrote, the awards I earned, the black belts I hold.

I learned compassion. I would wish no one to experience the pain of losing a loved one.

I learned to forgive. Forgiveness brings me comfort and hope.

I learned gratitude. The friends and family who supported me during these trying times are priceless. You have my gratitude.

I feel grateful for being comfortable with another’s persons’ pain while meeting them where they are.

I learned there is little value in judging another.

I am learning I want to stop judging. I have a long way to go here but I now know I have little to no understanding of why someone does what they do except that they are trying to take care of themselves. Taking care of yourself is a good thing. How it is expressed may not be.

I learned the value of ownership. If I cannot own what happens in my life I cannot change it or choose how I want to respond. It is my life and I want to be inner-directed and not be concerned about what others think. If I march to a different drum than accept me for the dance I chose or leave me alone.

I learned the impact I have on others even when I do not know I am having an impact. Therefore, I want to be thoughtful about what I think, say and do.

I learned I do not want drama in my life and it is my choice to accept it. When drama comes it can be a powerful source of learning.

I learned I am not responsible for how you feel. How you choose to feel is your choice and it has nothing to do with me.

I learned about the deepest pain a person can feel and realize there are always gifts if I am willing to look hard enough.

I learned material things will not change anything. I can be as happy or unhappy as I choose. It is not dependent on material things, though money can sometimes make it easier.

I learned being happy is a choice. Being happy is a decision. Happiness is not being giddy or loud, but a sense of peace and acceptance this too will pass.

I learned the value of having a personal relationship with God. Though I do not yet trust him, God does not test me or bring sorrow. He does comfort me if I let him.

I learned people really want to help during times of personal tragedy, but they don’t know how.

I learned I am responsible for all that happens to me and how I choose to react.

I learned how much I miss my son.

I learned how much I value my daughter

I learned a deeper love a grandfather can have for his grandson.

I learned to value my wife more than ever.

I learned I have friends I never really treated as friends.

I learned that I must forgive myself.

I learned I must forgive God.

I learned I don’t remember what I learned most of the time and that’s ok. The universe will keep sending me the same lesson in different forms until I learn it.

With that said, I learned I really don’t know much!

Ron Finklestein 330-990-0788 / ron@akris.net
Copyright 2018 – all rights reserved

Be patient with people who experienced a tragedy. The simplest act can bring tears. Do not judge, do not assume, ask. Give us time to heal. We all heal at our own pace.

 

Cheap Foods For A Healthy Diet

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), Obesity is common, serious and costly.  According to them, more than one-third (36.5%) of US adults have obesity, and while childhood obesity is declining it is still high and affects close to 13 million children in the United States.

What does that mean for your family?

According to them, low-income families are more in danger of having a child suffering from obesity, and also among adults, especially Blacks and Hispanics.

Obesity means a health issue problem that costs the United States government close to $150 million dollars a year.  If that is not something very troubling to consider, consider the health of your children and your spouse or partner and the health risks associated with obesity:

  1. Heart Disease
  2. Stroke
  3. Type 2 Diabetes
  4. Certain types of Cancer

All those diseases are preventable diseases that can be combatted by exercising and having a diet that is reasonable.  There seems to be a misconception between a healthy diet and the high cost of acquiring it.  Contrary to many of these misconceptions, there are many healthy foods you can find at your grocery store that do not cost a lot of money, for example:

  1. Lentils – A 1 lb. of Lentils at the local grocery cost can cost you around $1.50. Half a cup of cooked lentils can give you around 9 grams of protein, iron, and potassium with 115 calories.  You can cook the lentils in soups or side dishes with other vegetables that can give you many nutrients your body needs.
  2. Beans – A 1 lb. of beans at your local grocery store can cost you as little as $1.39. Beans are full of fiber, potassium, and magnesium.  They are a great source of healthy carbohydrates that can fight off hunger and keeps you feeling full longer. Beans and lentils are two cheap alternatives to meat and the recipes you can do with beans and lentils range from salads to soups and everything in between. Hint: soaking beans and lentils overnight can make it easy and quick for you to cook the next day.
  3. Oats – Who said cereals are the only breakfast in the United States?  Replacing cereal with oatmeal is not only cheaper but healthier too.  The sugars that are included in every serving of cereal will show in a bigger belly in your child.  Oatmeal will keep your child feeling full longer, and your wallet will show the difference.
  4. Sweet Potatoes –  sweet potatoes are full of vitamin A and vitamin C. A 3lb. bag of sweet potatoes at your grocery store can cost you around $2.94.  If you cook the potatoes in the oven with a teaspoon of oil and a dash of salt, you will have a dish that is filling, cheap and is good for you.
  5. Regular Potatoes – Regular potatoes are full of fiber but also full of vitamin C and Potassium.  The bad rep they get as a fatty, unhealthy food is because we think we need to eat them fried, full of butter and cheese, or accompanied by a big hamburger. This cheap food will certainly keep your child full and happy after they eat it for dinner.

Having a healthy diet does not have to be expensive. You do have to adjust your thinking and your stomach to these new foods and to prepare them in a way that seem appetizing to you and your family.  But, the benefits associated with these foods are too many for you to ignore, and the cost associated with them is too little for you not to try.

Recipes with these items are abundant, and the steps to follow to get a great result are all over the internet.

Happy eating and Good health!

Addiction and Recognizing the Signs

How to Spot Addiction

This article is not written by a doctor.  If you have doubts about someone having an addition problem, call a specialist right away.  This article is for general information anyone should know to keep in mind when they see problems and changes in people around them.

Because an addiction can negatively affect someone’s entire life, and other people around them, it is very important that their loved ones know exactly how to spot addiction. Also, because not all addictions are the same, family and friends should also understand what an individual may be addicted to. Having said that, here are a few of the most common types of addictions that many people are dealing with today.

Substance Abuse Addictions

• Alcohol
• Opiods
• Cocaine
• Marijuana
• Hallucinogens
• Tobacco
• Prescription Drugs (like tranquilizers, sleeping pills, sedatives)

Behavior Addictions

• Sex
• Food
• Using the Internet / Social Media
• Porn
• Gaming
• Shopping
• Cutting

 

All of these can have different negative effects on that person’s life. In some cases, the addiction takes over their life, and can even be fatal in the end. Particularly, when the individual is dealing with some form of substance abuse addiction. Everyone should want to know the signs to recognize a person with addictions. Read further to see the different types, the changes in behavior and how to get help.

1. Changes in Appearance

When an individual is dealing with an alcohol or a drug abuse addiction, there are some common problems that they can begin to experience. For instance, the individual may begin to lose excessive amounts of weight at a time, and people around them may discover that there are strange smells on their breath and their clothing.

2. Loses their Appetite and Lack of Sleep

In some cases, people may begin to experience a loss of appetite and they do not want to sleep. The changes that people can see on the surface are lacks of interest in both eating and sleeping.

3. Personal Grooming Goes to the Wayside

Another easy to see sign of a substance abuse individual is a lack of interest in their overall appearance. Also, they may lose interest in personal grooming activities like showering, washing one’s clothing items and even brushing their own teeth. At this stage of substance abuse, it is not uncommon for loved ones to notice these visible changes and begin to make plans to intervene.

4. Begins to Forget Things

During an individual’s bout of dealing with substance abuse, they may also begin to lose track of information and forget things altogether. At this stage, intervention is even more important as it shows a serious degeneration of their lives and a lack of ability to function.

5. Begins to Withdraw from Others

When the individual has been under influence of these drugs, they may also begin to withdraw from others and stop going to social gatherings. This will only get worse if the addition is not addressed promptly.

Getting help is the first step to recovery. Fortunately, there are many different ways to address these issues and they include intervention, personal one on one help with a trained professional in the psychological, health and medical field.  The place to start is to call an addiction center or service.  There are free and paid options in most places and you can simply do a Google search for addiction services and your city name to find a variety of options.

 

The Connection Between Health and Sleep

Research has for many years associated the lack of sleep to poor performance at work, school, and people’s health. Now, the correlation between some illnesses and lack of sleep has been more troubling for some people, considering the fact that many Americans are sleeping less than ever before.

School age children need a minimum of 9 hours of sleep per night, and with the increasing extra curricular activities, homework, and computer games  they are involved in, they are not getting enough sleep.

Women’s number one sleep problem is insomnia. Juggling work, home and children, one has to wonder if they ever get 8 hours of sleep per night. Sleep deprivation and low levels of melatonin have been associated with an increase risk of developing type 2 diabetes. Melatonin, a natural hormone made by our bodies is inactive during the day, but it’s active when the sun goes down.

So, how many hours of sleep do you really need to get? Here is the recommended sleep list by the National Sleep foundation.

1.Adults 65 and over, 7-8 hours

2. Adults 24-64 years old,  7-9 hours

3.Young Adults, 18-25 years old, 7-9 hours

4. Teenagers 14-17 years old, 8-10 hours

5. School Age Children 6-13 years old, 9-11 hours

6.Preschool children 3-5 years old, 10-13 hours

7. Toddlers 1-2 years old,11-14 hours

8. Infants 4-11 months old,  12-15 hours

9. Newborns 0-3 months old, 14-17 hours

Middle schoolers and high schoolers across the country get up very early to get to school on time.  The chances they are not getting enough sleep are pretty likely.  Avoiding caffeinated drinks and sugar rich beverages late in the afternoon should be avoided.  Turn off the TV, and video games console; they will complain, but their sleep is more important. At this age in their lives, sleep is not priority number one, or two , or three.  It is your responsibility to at least turn off their devices, and tell them to go to sleep.

Coffee: The Pros and Cons

Many people, from adults with full-time jobs, or college kids with packed schedules, rely on coffee as a source of energy. People not only depend on the effects from the caffeine, but genuinely enjoy the flavor. Coffee can be comforting, especially during the cooler months, when it feels even better to sip on something warm. According to an analysis by the European Journal of Epidemiology and a study conducted by the McGill University Health Centre, coffee’s benefits outweigh its risks.

  1. Coffee consumption helps prevent against cardiovascular diseases and cancer.
  2. Smoking decreases the benefits that coffee has for your body.
  3. Despite popular belief, there is no correlation between coffee and its link to the probably of getting gastric cancer.
  4. Can help prevent diabetes by increasing plasma levels and boosting your metabolism.
  5. Can aid/prevent damage in the liver.
  6. Drinking coffee can help stimulate the central nervous system which can protect against neurodegenerative disorders such as Parkinson’s disease.
  7. A single cup of coffee also contains many nutrients such as Riboflavin, magnesium, manganese, potassium, and niacin.
  8. According to a 2011 study conducted by Harvard School of Public Health, women who drank at least four cups of coffee per day, were 20% less likely to become depressed.

When coffee might not be the right call for you…

  1. There is a very small link between coffee and miscarriage, so if you’re expecting, coffee might not be your #1 go to beverage.
  2. Caffeine can raise LDL cholesterol, however proper filtration of the coffee grounds can help eliminate most of the risk.
  3. If you have trouble sleeping at night, or suffer from anxiety, coffee might not be the right drink for you.

In conclusion, although coffee has a multitude of benefits, those benefits can also be overshadowed by how you drink it. Many of the pros that are related to coffee are not included in high-calorie options from popular coffee shops. When drinks contain more milk, than coffee, it is likely that you are just getting more sugar and fats than any real health advantages. Be wary of flavored creams and artificial sugars, instead, opt for a splash of milk, or even some honey or agave nectar for added sweetness.

Akron is full of wonderful coffee shops and cafes.  Near colleges, like Kent State University in Kent you can find local, one of a kind places to get a fresh cup.

Basic Healthy Living Roadmap

The Cleveland Clinic and many other hospitals and organizations across the country offer programs on health and nutrition that can help you live a healthy life.  The Cleveland Clinic lists 7 things you need to eat and do to live a healthy life.

  1. Eat at least 7 helping of fruits and vegetables daily.
  2. Choose whole grain more often. Packages  are now labeled with whole grain, multigrain , etc. Read the labels!
  3. Limit your meat consumption.  Chicken and fish are the recommended meats by every organization that deals with healthy living.  Processed meats are not to be included in your diet, or to be kept to a very minimum.
  4. Consume foods rich in calcium and vitamin D.  While exercising, aim to get fifteen minutes of sun exposure
  5. The way you cook your meals is important.  Poaching eggs instead of frying them can help you maintain a healthy weight.  Steaming vegetables instead of frying them, or microwaving them is always preferable.
  6. Get active.  If you start slowly is better than not starting at all.  Dedicate a set  time where you exercise regardless of whether you have dishes in the sink, or laundry to switch.  Choose a time where it’s very probable you’ll make it.  It will become a habit if you stick to it for a week or two.
  7. And last but not least, Keep a healthy body weight.  It is so hard to start when you have 30 or more pounds to loose, that you get discouraged.  But, remember the weight didn’t come overnight, and having a healthy body weight lets you live longer.  Isn’t that worth the effort?

Before I close this, there is something you need to check out as well. The trackers online allow you to create a profile to find out what and how much to eat. You can enter basic information, and they will have a personalized plan for you to explore. Check it out and see if it fits your lifestyle. GO! and let us know if it works for you.

Which Food to Shop For a Healthy Liver

Still trying to get healthy for the New Year?  Today we focus on the second largest organ in your body – the liver. Considering that your liver has to work overtime filtering chemicals from the blood, you shouldn’t take this particular organ for granted. Like everything else in your body, the key to ensuring that your liver stays healthy is eating healthy and not indulging in substance abuse. As a part of the whole digestive process, everything that you consume, whether it may be food, drink or medicine, goes through your liver. This means that when you put too much harmful stuff into your system, your liver will have to filter those through and prevent those from coming into your bloodstream. Do note that while the food listed below will help in ensuring that this vital organ remains healthy, everything will be useless if you make your liver work overtime when you consume harmful substances for your body. With that in mind, let’s begin our list of food for a healthier liver.

  1. Turmeric. The Global Healing Center has named turmeric as the “liver’s favorite spice”. Turmeric helps the body process fats and will encourage bile production. Adding turmeric into your diet will help your liver detoxify by getting rid of carcinogens.
  2. Green leafy veggies. Remember when your mom would force you to eat your green veggies and you grudgingly obey? Well, as it turns out, that simple act done regularly will help you avoid issues with your liver later on in life. It’s even better if you consume organic products. Why so? Well, as previously mentioned, you liver filters everything you put in your mouth, including some possible leftover pesticides that may have been left there from non-organic veggies. Leafy vegetables have a neutralizing ability, which will help your liver when it encounters metals, chemicals and pesticides that you have consumed through food.
  3. Cruciferous vegetables. You can almost never go wrong with veggies. Brussels sprouts, broccoli and cauliflower belong to this category. Cruciferous vegetables are rich in compounds called glucosinolate, which helps the liver get rid of toxins you have ingested into your system.
  4. Grapefruit. This is not the first time that eating vitamin C rich food has proven to help your body. Grapefruit contains vitamin C and glutathione, which has been found to be helpful in aiding the liver do its job of filtering harmful toxins in the body.
  5. Walnuts. Fond of munching on these? Like grapefruit, walnuts are rich in glutathione, which as mentioned above, will help your liver do its job. Plus, walnuts also contain Omega-3 fatty acids, so consuming it will not only ensure your liver’s health, but also that of your heart.

With the many unhealthy food and substances we tend to consume daily with our diet, you can imagine how much a football-size organ has to do in order to filter those from our bloodstream. Remember, eating food such as the ones mentioned above in a regular basis is only a part of the whole process in ensuring that your liver remains healthy. With proper diet and avoidance of harmful substances as much as we can, there is no reason why we cannot save ourselves the trouble of dealing with liver disease in the future.

Akron Boxing and Kickboxing

For a lot of people, boxing paints a mental image of two individuals beating each other into a square ring on national TV. Recently however, the sport of boxing has become more available and tapered to any kind of individual. Kickboxing first seemed to spur the initial boxing trend, but then eventually, boxing and kickboxing clubs started popping up everywhere. On social media, you began to see your favorite stars donning boxing gloves and posing by bags. It’s all for a good reason too, boxing has some major mental and physical benefits that can burn a ton of calories as well.

  1. Boxing helps lower stress levels. The amount of adrenaline you get from punching a bag after a long, stressful day is incredibly rewarding. The hormones and chemicals released afterwards are a great way to boosting your mood and feeling incredibly productive.
  2. Boxing is a great workout, and works the entire body. Not only does it work your arms and shoulders. But continuously hitting the bag, and rotating your body, works out your entire core, and makes your heart rate skyrocket. All of this results in a killer workout for your entire body, and ends up burning a ton of calories. This is also great for keeping a healthy heart and mind.
  3. Boxing is a great way to improve hand-eye coordination. Many of the moves in boxing require a focused eye and a good mind and body connection. Constant drills, and routines that have set moves are great for this, and continuous practice will really help improve these skills.

Now that boxing has become more available, and friendly for everyday people, it is a great way to mix up your workout routine, and get yourself in a friendly environment with people who are trying something new, and trying to improve themselves.

Remember to check with your doctor before trying anything new like boxing or kickboxing.  You want to be sure you are ready for a good workout and you do not have any issues that might be made worse by the repetitive motion or the types of movements you will be making.  Most clubs ease you into the sport and make sure you are ready, so do not worry that you are going to be fighting people.  You move at your own pace.

How To Keep Germs Away This Flu Season

During a school flu outbreak, it is very likely your child will come home sick and will get the other members of your home sick as well. The Center for Disease Control (CDC) http://www.cdc.gov/flu/pdf/freeresources/updated/everyday_preventive.pdf offers some guidelines to help you deal with a flu outbreak at school or at work, and here are 7 concise easy steps to follow if you are home with a sick child or spouse.

  1. Wash your hands and your children’s hands with soap and water every time you enter your home. Keeping germs away from the outside world is a good tip for anyone dealing with small and school age children.
  2. Change linens and bathroom towels daily when you are sick. Contaminating each other by using the same towels or sharing a pillow will ensure that everyone gets sick, and stay sick for a longer period of time.
  3. Disinfecting kitchen and bathroom counters thorough out the day will ensure that you’ll encounter less germs going forward.
  4. Believe it or not, feeding your children chicken noodle soup will get them through their illness a bit faster
  5. Covering their mouths on their sleeves instead of their hands should decrease the number of germs they spread around the home.
  6. Cleaning door knobs around the home will greatly decrease the germs that get passed around.
  7. A diet full of fruits and vegetables can do a lot of good to your child. The old saying of “An apple a day will keep the doctor away” hasn’t survived this long for no reason.

Whether you are in Akron or anywhere, this is great advice.

For more about flu outbreaks and what to do about them, check the CDC for more information.

How To Keep Your Children Healthier This Year

Many parents around the country try successfully or unsuccessfully to keep their children healthy. Eating well, and reminding them to wash their hands, are some of the many things we as parents remind our children to do.  But, one of the things that researchers know that can benefit your child now and in the future is getting enough sleep. Researchers have found that children with late bedtimes are more likely to be obese as adolescents than those with early bedtimes (8:00 pm) http://www.jpeds.com/article/S0022-3476(16)30361-4/abstract. The difference between early bedtimes and late bedtimes for children’s obesity in their adolescent years is approximately 13%.  Turning off the TV and electronic devices to ensure proper rest for our children seem to be something we can do as parents that will benefit our children all their lives.

For preschoolers and kindergartner children an 8:00 p.m. bedtime is feasible, but for older children, the idea of sending them to bed at 8:00 p.m. seems a bit ridiculous.That’s why the new recommendation guidelines from The American Academy of Sleep Medicine breaks down children by age and the recommended amount of sleep children should get daily.

  • Babies 4 months to 12 months should get 12 to 16 hours
  • Children 1 to 2 years old should get 11 to 14 hours
  • Children 3 to 5 years old should get 10 to 13 hours
  • Children 6 to 12 years old should get nine to 12 hours
  • Teenagers 13 to 18 years old should get eight to 10 hours

Many researches agree that not only early bed times are important, but the number of hours of sleep children get on a daily basis. Letting our children’s bodies get the rest they need improves their capacity to concentrate at school, and researches have found that getting enough sleep benefits their mental health as well.

Next time before turning on the TV at night, ask yourself if that is really a good choice for your family. Read a book, do a puzzle, or any other activity that will keep your children on a good bedtime schedule.